The Grass is Greener on the Other Side
A man rushes through the door, clutching his briefcase. His frazzled behavior and rumpled clothes are victims of the sleepless nights he has endured –coffee being his only solace. On his way to the counter, he passes a table occupied by two girls. They’re caught in this moment full of laughter, trading stories and reminiscing on good times. Their joy feels palpable, lighting up the corner of the café they sit in; a stark contrast to the hurried steps of a mother who rushes past, carrying her crying child. Her eyes hint at the exhaustion she’s suffered. As the door slams behind her, the faces left behind tell stories unknown, each a fragment of countless, untold lives.
This is the essence of sonder: The sudden awareness that each passerby carries a life as rich, vivid, and complex as any other. In a world in which interactions often stay at a surface level, it’s easy to reduce people to a brief impression without pausing to consider the intricacies of their lives. Sonder reveals the vastness within every individual, one that is rarely acknowledged. Each glance, spoken word, and silent pause is an echo of that complexity.
Life is a mystery, one that each person is desperately trying to solve. Everyone is navigating their own path, often unsure if they've cracked the code of existence. As life unfolds, everyone moves through familiar moments, yet each person’s journey is distinct. Common experiences such as grief, joy and hope are interpreted through the lens of individual scripts, shaped by memories, cultures and emotions. An autumn leaf falling might invoke feelings of beauty and renewal in one person, while stirring up a nostalgic ache for someone else. Each interpretation of the same moment offers a new glimpse into the uniqueness of perspective. Recognizing these differences can illuminate the subtle ways in which similar experiences become deeply personal. Each individual response reveals a layered history and a unique way of moving through the world. As perspectives intertwine, the result is an intricate web of shared yet distinct human moments.
Sonder brings forward the importance of expanding one’s viewpoint, holding others’ perspectives in mind as part of daily life. While it is easy to label people and throw them into roles (friends, strangers, colleagues) each person carries unseen layers of dreams, fears, and memories. Every interaction is part of a larger, unfolding narrative that is impossible for everyone to see and understand. By acknowledging the perspective of others, familiar experiences are deepened. It becomes possible to understand why someone might pull away in pain or grow defensive during a difficult conversation. The overlapping ripples of personal experience affect everyone differently, and each interaction bears traces of countless past influences. Recognizing this connection fosters empathy, creating a thread of understanding that runs deeper than differences.
As a society defined by rapid judgments and fleeting impressions, sonder paves a path for deeper connections. Today’s fast-paced culture often favors quick conclusions over a deeper understanding, with social media and news cycles frequently presenting others in simplified, often misleading ways; but genuine understanding requires space for complexity. Embracing sonder means allowing each individual’s story to unfold without the need to categorize, judge, or assume.
When it comes to empathy, diversity becomes a strength rather than a division. Embracing the unseen layers of others can create resilience, encouraging a society that values curiosity, understanding, and compassion. With this perspective, even the smallest interactions gain significance as part of a larger web of humanity.The world cannot be simplified, nor can the lives within it. Every moment holds profound weight, with each life intricately intertwined with others. To call any life simple would be a disservice to the intricacies of living. In a world filled with unseen lives and untold stories, sonder offers a deeper view of humanity –a reminder that the grass is not only greener on the other side but on every side.
Written by Isana Mehta, Photography: Kaden Daulton, Social Media: Manuela Diez, Styling: Cindy Chen